The Healthy Prostate.com

Arousal, Erection, Orgasm and Ejaculation are often considered to be a package deal for men: you can't have one without the other. To enjoy more sexual pleasure and erotic freedom, it is essential to dismantle this myth and understand these events to be complementary experiences that may come in any combination.

Arousal: An experience of sexual stimulation and pleasure, visual, tactile or otherwise. Can be brief or prolonged, sought out or spontaneous. The dictionary definition of "arouse" is "to evoke or awaken."  This definition reminds us that arousal awakens the erotic part of us that is always within us, a part of our very being. Stimulation from any number of sources can awaken this energy, bringing our attention more fully to our sexuality and desires.

Erection: A physical response, in which the penis is engorged with blood and becomes more rigid. Both men and women have erectile tissue in their genitals, and both men and women can experience erections. Erection pulls the skin of the genitals more taut around the shaft of the penis or clitoris, exposing more nerve endings and heightening sensation. Contrary to popular "blue balls" myth, erections can come and go painlessly - and "losing" an erection does not need to end a sexual encounter. Erections are also not an on/off switch - most men experience a range of erectile stages, each with their own pleasures. Our cultural obsession with erectile disorder has the uninvited effect of making many men ashamed of becoming less erect, even if they are highly aroused. This sometimes ends sexual encounters prematurely, shaming both partners and causing resentment. Embracing all stages of erection - including the aroused but not erect penis- can greatly extend sexual pleasure and take the pressure off men to be constantly hard when aroused.

Orgasm: A climax of sexual excitement, marked in men and women by involuntary contractions of the pelvic muscles and an intense sensation of pleasure. Both men and women can experience one or more orgasms in any given sexual event, with or without ejaculation. Most people experience a building of sexual excitement towards a threshold, and  a "point of inevitability" at which orgasm is imminent. Orgasms can range from mild to wild, quick to long lasting, serene to bestial.

Ejaculation: The release of sexual fluids from the urethra, usually (but not always) during sexual excitement. Ejaculate is a combination of several components - fluid from the prostate and other glands, and (in men only) sperm.  The contractions of the pelvic muscle help propel the ejaculate fluid out of the body.

There is a lot of fuss about ejaculation in the sex education world: men want to learn how to withhold ejaculation, and women want to learn how to ejaculate. Both goals are seen as markers of enlightenment or sophistication. It is our position that ejaculation is just one of the many pleasurable options for sexual climax, and is neither more nor less advanced that non-ejaculatory orgasms. Some traditions discourage frequent ejaculation, citing the emission of precious fluids as depleting to overall health and vitality. You are the best expert on your own  body - experiment and pay attention to how you feel. Does ejaculation make you feel tired, or energize you? Does getting aroused without having an orgasm keep you erotically charged all day, or create frustration?

Enjoy the process of discovering these four distinct and pleasurable processes in your body! Have any questions about arousal, erection, orgasm or ejaculation? Leave a comment or Contact Us and we'll do you best to answer your questions!